Change, it’s something that every human goes through. That growth comes in many categories from the physical growth we experience as we age to the personal growth that we experience as we learn more about ourselves and the world as we grow older. Change can be a huge thing in our lives that some find themselves dreading. When a moment of change comes into our lives, some decide to go with it and grow as a person and some decide to evade it and stay in the state that they are in at that moment. Some choose to grow and some choose to remain stagnant.
Alex Leyba is a YouTuber and filmmaker who has been on the platform since 2016. He started out with Blu-Ray buying videos and reviews that showcase his passion for films. As the years have went on, Alex has been experimenting with the concept of making his own films. This started with cinematic style vlogs and came full circle with the two projects i’ll be discussing in this piece, those being “The Alex Leyba Movie” and “My Name Is Alex”. The Alex Leyba Movie is a 2 hour and 42 minute epic that caps off the many storylines that he has developed on his channel in a climactic ending to the channel as a whole. My Name Is Alex is a 50 minute pseudo sequel that discusses the aftermath of the film and how Alex has been viewing his life after dropping the film and moving towards a different direction in his life. Both films discuss the concept of personal growth and how different people handle it in very different ways. The idea that some decide to move on and grow while others stay in the bubble that they already know.
The Alex Leyba Movie follows Alex as he has to deal with the unexpected move in of his cousin Mason. Mason is kicked out of his uncle’s house because he causes to much trouble in his uncle’s life. The film sees the pair running into characters from their past as they struggle with or discuss the concept of personal growth to Alex and Mason who themselves are at the crossroads.
The character of John in the film is one that Alex looked up to as a person and as a movie collector. John came before Alex and many others in his period of movie collecting so he holds John highly. We see John in this film as someone who moved on from that life because he realized that there was more out there for him. All three of the friends that populated John’s channel have all moved on to better things and have found some joy and happiness in the things that they discovered. Alex sees that and longs for that movement in life but isn’t quite sure how to achieve it at that moment in the film.
He also runs into a character named Bronson, who spent his recent years hating on another character who had wronged him in high school. He even created an arrogant personality to hide behind. He realizes through his plot that his life would be much better if he gave up this persona and lived his life as the person that he truly was. That person being the one that he left behind when he decided to pick up this version of himself filled with hate and vengeance.
One character named Dalton that has been apart of the storyline of the channel since the beginning. He has been the “asshole” character in the story as he is not liked by any of the other characters. He believed that he was better being the off putting one. As the story has gone on, he has found things that have helped him get out of that asshole lifestyle. In this film it is shown that he now has a wife and daughter and that he cares more about their protection and happiness than being the loud and obnoxious “Stiffler” type like he use to be. He has realized the error of his ways and has moved on from that lifestyle.
Alex’s friend Josh who made videos with him in the start has moved on and has dropped his youtube channel which baffles Alex. Josh has not been making videos with Alex as of late and he states that it’s because he doesn’t like the person that Alex has become. He sees that Alex refuses to grow up and move on and that has caused distance between the two. Mason sees all these examples and finally notices the error of his ways. He decides to smooth things over with his uncle because he doesn’t wanna become what Alex has become because Mason sees the errors in Alex’s ways.
The movie ends with Alex deciding to burn his movie collection as a way to make a public statement that he is ready to move on. His oldest friend and collaborator Ben shows up and is baffled by the choices that Alex is making. He sees this whole burning as a ridiculous stunt until Alex explains the situation at hand. Alex has realized that he wants to become a real filmmaker and the youtube and movie collecting obsessions have got in the way of him truly achieving that. The final shot of the film is Alex and Ben sitting in front of the burning movies and Alex is internally contemplating what the next step in his life will be.
This film doesn’t entirely work for it’s long 2 hour and 42 minute runtime, but the messages and subtext is consistent. Alex pulled many questions and concepts that he was struggling with and injected it into this film. The film is a very bold passion project that showcases the pure love for cinema the next generation of filmmakers coming up now has. The film is personal but also super universal as it discusses the concept of our struggles as humans with change that happen to us externally and internally. While not always working, it’s worth a watch.
My Name Is Alex is where this idea comes full circle. The content of this film recontextualizes the events of the previous film and deepens the messages and subtext present in Leyba’s work. My Name Is Alex takes place three months after the events of The Alex Leyba Movie as we see Alex trying to live a life without his obsession with collecting movies and making youtube videos. It is clear in the first moments that he is not happy as he doesn’t really try to do anything with his life. He goes to work and comes home and that’s about it. He doesn’t try to meet people and make connections and he also is not trying to work on his filmmaking career. Ben suggests that he gets back into making youtube videos and Alex is against the idea. He sees it as regressive and don’t want any part in it. A health scare where Alex finds out that he has high blood pressure doesn’t help the case either. Through the film he meets up with Dalton and Ben and discusses his current feelings of emptiness.
He meets up with Dalton because Dalton wants to talk to him about some important matters. Dalton tells Alex that he watched the film and loved it. He states that watching the film and the videos he was apart of made him realize how much fun he had making videos and how he wants to make more. Alex and Dalton get into a heated argument when Alex states that he doesn’t want to make them anymore. Alex hates the fact that Dalton wants to make videos with him now that he has decided to give up on the passion. They come to an agreement about the state of the matter when Alex starts to think about what Dalton is truly stating.
This is followed up by a big scene where Alex discusses with Ben about how he doesn’t want to make videos because he feels like it is holding him back from growing as a person and how the videos have driven his friends and family out of his life. Ben states that he seems like he’s happier when he’s making the videos and with the sudden entrance of an old character, Alex decides to go back to doing youtube. Alex falls into his old lifestyle and personality as we see him ask Ben to drive to a movie premiere that he doesn’t wanna go to and get him autographs. The selfish parts of Alex have returned as they were before and he even states to Ben that he has replaced his addiction to movies with an addiction to autographs.
The film ends with Alex going to a premiere and visiting a set of a movie. Alex as a character feels like he has started to progress personally and feels like giving up the channel was a terrible idea. At first glance, this seems like a happy ending and the way that it’s executed with an epic montage to My Chemical Romance’s “Welcome To The Black Parade” (as a reference to Clerks 3) seems to cement that notion. To me this seems like a happy ending in a short term sense as Alex is getting a couple opportunities at that moment, but there’s a sadder long term concept that is at play here. That concept being that Alex has fallen back into old habits because he was uncomfortable with a world without his channel, which he had been doing for a while. Similar to Brooks in “The Shawshank Redemption” and how he feels about being outside of the prison, the character of Alex Leyba has spent too much time in a his life with this channel that even though he sees it as a negative thing holding him back, he can’t truly give it away because it’s comfortable. This second film shows how easy it is for someone to relapse into a behaviour or pattern because it’s comfortable for them despite it possibly being negative or detrimental to their mental health or their personal growth.
The combination of these two films showcases the concept of personal growth and the crossroads that we find ourselves at throughout our lives. Every character in these two films hit a bump and notice that they need to go through some personal change. Every character in these two films decide to move on and find something more fulfilling in their lives except for Alex. The character of Alex tries to go through personal growth but ends up existing in a personal standstill for three months until he decides to go back to his old ways. His whole identity changes back to the one that drove away his friends and family because he was comfortable in it because he spent a significant part of his life in that bubble. He realizes that it’s time to change and move on, but he doesn’t push himself in the right direction and doesn’t go after opportunities that could help him get on the right path. He instead makes a huge proclamation of change and doesn’t do anything about it. It shows off the very human concept that even if we state that we want to change, it’s easy for us to get complacent and not act on the revelations we have at these crossroads.
Through the narrative of these two films, it is shown that we are much happier when we go with these changes, despite them feeling scary at first, they end up being the best choices that we have to make. This is definitely relevant to me in terms of my decision to live as myself when I came out as trans. It was hard at first, but I definitely feel like I have grown as a person because I’ve decided to live as my truest self as the woman that I am. Another personal experience that relates to this is when I decided to move to Toronto and live by myself. It was a bit scary to think of the concept of living by myself in the big city at first but it ultimately has been a positive move towards me becoming the best version of myself and achieving my goals.
These films are an example of the opposite, as the character has come to similar crossroads and has decided to stay in the small bubble of existence that they already have lived in for a while. The character of Alex is scared to move on and make the next step, but doing that would probably bring the ultimate and long term happiness that he is looking for. All of us as humans come to crossroads in our lives where we have to make hard choices in terms of personal growth and change. These two films discuss those crossroads and the two options we are often given really well. While some of us decide to go with the new and possibly scary growth, some decide to become stagnant and they get stuck in an echo chamber of existence that they can’t escape from if they spend too much time there. Humans are suppose to learn and grow with the experiences that we are given and if we decide to not do that, it leads to some negative consequences.
The Ratings:
The Alex Leyba Movie:
My Name Is Alex:
The Alex Leyba Movie (2022):
My Name Is Alex (2022):
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